Balloon Day

I was listening to the radio on the way home from work today, and they were talking about this prank gone horribly wrong. It got me thinking about something we used to do in elementary school called 'Balloon Day.'

The premise was simple. Every student filled out a postcard with his or her name and address. The card was attached to the string of a balloon. At the end of the day, a special outside assembly was held. At a designated time, every student would release his balloon. Eventually, the balloon would break, sending your self-addressed postcard back down to Earth. The finder of said postcard was then to write a brief message on the back, noting the geographic location where the card was found. It was always bragging rights to the kid whose balloon went the furthest.
So how fucking stupid were we? Aside from all of the environmental concerns with sending pieces of balloon back to the Earth, what about child predators? If you liked naked little children, can you imagine your delight when it started raining names and addresses? I am pretty sure that helium can cross the Megan's Law boundaries, so this was a pretty fucking stupid idea. And parents now think MySpace is bad...

My Baby Takes the Morning Train

There can only be a handful of reasons, Mr. Talkstooloud, that made you punish the rest of us with your inane conversation. I have summarized these below:

+ You truly don't know that you speak that loudly, or that your voice really carries
+ You are an attention-whore that wants people to overhear your conversation so they think you are cool/important/fun
+You really are so rude that you didn't notice everyone shaking their heads and rolling their eyes at you

Honestly. Your conversation went for over an hour solid. There are three dead spots along the way, but you kept going! I am sure your conversation about electrical boxes and managerial status really was that pressing, but next time try to keep it down please